One year ago (ok, a year + a week since I’m behind) this precious little peanut was born.
This past year as simultaneously flown by and taken forever and my little peanut is now a little munchkin who wants to investigate everything and is already trying to eat us out of house and home.
He’s not walking yet, but getting pretty close. His top 2 teeth are just starting to come in too so pretty soon he’ll really start to resemble a chipmunk (he’s already mastered stuffing his cheeks full of food). Probably his biggest achievement this last month has been discovering that he can put objects into bins rather than just dump them out everywhere. Last night I watched him happily pick up all his blocks and put them back in their box before bed (I’m under no illusions that this will last).
This lucky guy got not one, not two, but THREE Birthday celebrations!
For his main party, I fully admit to losing my shit a little bit. I made a balloon garland (meant to do 2, but I ran out of time and balloons #pinterestmomfail). I made tassels. I spray painted dollar store animal figures. And after all of that everyone ended up hanging out outside because the weather was glorious and the kids had a splash table and bubbles. I didn’t take tons of pictures because i spent more time enjoying the party itself. #momwin
Moral of the story is, it’s ok to lose your shit. It’s a first birthday and a big milestone. But if you play it simple (and dare I say, sane?) that’s cool too! Baby won’t care and none of your friends will judge you (and if they do, get better friends, seriously).
Second moral of the story: if there is any chance you’ll be spending time outside, clean off your Garden Chair of Solitude and make sure you have an outdoor or folding table. I quickly grabbed the coffee table from the porch so we could move the food nearby. Our backyard is still a mess, so I hadn’t really planned to be out there the whole time, but it worked!
His second party piggy-backed on my Grammie’s 90th birthday. His birthday is the day before hers and we had a big family reunion in Maine. We got to see tons of relatives we don’t usually see and spent the day before his birthday traveling for 12 straight hours (drive to a park-n-ride, shuttle to the airport, fly to Boston, wait for baggage, bus to the rental cars, drive out of Boston,* continue driving to Maine**). During my Grammie’s party all the July birthdays got a special shot-out and bonus cupcakes (because apparently there are loads of us–myself included).
After Maine, we drove back to Massachusetts (with a stop in the White Mountains of New Hampshire) to visit Matt’s Grammie. We also went over to Matt’s uncle’s and they had a surprise party for Wesley. Kiddo got pretty spoiled by all his relatives!
I don’t know where they got this smash cake from, but it was seriously the perfect size. I got his main birthday cake from our local grocery store chain (Lunds & Byerlys) and they include a free smash cake for a first birthday*** but, as you can see from the earlier pictures, it’s frickin huge (7 inches) for a little baby. I almost wish I had just gotten a jumbo cupcake instead (but hey, it’s hard to argue with free****).
*City motto: Fuck GPS
**Matt kept describing it as “Northern Maine,” it wasn’t even the northern half of the state….but possibly the northern end of the populated half of Maine.
***Lots of places apparently do this, so if you’re planning a first birthday party just ask around (I know Hyvee does and I’ve heard Target does).
****Part of it being free was that there were no custom options (which I can’t really argue with because, free). It originally had balloons and a 1 on the top, but since I had a cake topper I wanted to use, I just carefully scraped them off. Matt thought I was nuts, but it wasn’t my first cake surgery,***** so I more or less knew what I was doing.
*****I worked food service in a nursing home in high school and college, and got called done to one of the party rooms one day because the cake ordered for a resident’s birthday had her name misspelled. I was elected to fix it–no pressure. Thanks to our annual Pig Roast, I can also craft 3D pigs out of frosting like a goddamn pro.
Wesley the Crusher is now 11 months old! He’s 24lbs, has 2 teeth (and is working on 2 more), and has almost discovered his knees. He still mostly drags himself around like a walrus, but occasionally we see him move a few feet on all fours. He’s pulling himself up on everything, whether it’s stable or not, and super curious. Luckily for the cats he’s also (gradually) getting more gentle with them.
Poor little guy also just got his first significant illness. He’s had a few colds, and a mild case of croup, but this time he has something that’s really taken a tole on him. It’s pretty scary for the parents when your baby’s temperature climbs to 105, but our pediatrician said that babies tend to run a little hotter, so while it’s definitely a significant fever, it’s not an oh-my-god-my-baby-is-dying fever. The doctor thinks it might be Hand Foot and Mouth since he had a couple red spots on his feet. The spots haven’t spread at all though, so who knows. Either way, he’s doing MUCH better today, but still exhausted.
Traveling With Baby
Over Memorial Day we took Wesley on his first plane trip, fittingly enough, to North Carolina. It was actually a great choice for a first flight because it was 1) fairly short (2 hours in the air), 2) a direct flight, and 3) we were visiting family and they had a bunch of extra baby gear so there was less big stuff we had to lug. We’ll be doing a more intense trip later in the summer, but after this one I’m feeling pretty optimistic.
We got the Summer Infant 3D Lite stroller a couple months ago. Our travel system stroller was way too bulky to be convenient and we knew we’d be navigating airports in the near future. You can get super-cheap umbrella strollers, but the 3D Lite had some great features without being super pricey. We’ve been using it as our everyday stroller, but it small/light enough to work well in airports too.
1) It’s tall enough for parents. This is a common complaint when I was reading reviews of umbrella strollers–unless you’re super-petite the handles tend to be uncomfortably low. This does mean that it’s larger than a lot of other umbrella stroller and it barely fits in the trunk of my Chevy Sonic…but it does fit and all the other features make it totally worth it.
2) Storage! The 3D Lite has a generous basket underneath which I find to be incredibly useful.
4) Sun shade. While it won’t protect your baby from everything, it’s better than nothing for sure!
5) Recline options. The 3D Lite has multiple recline options, and can go almost horizontal, which is awesome if you need some nap time on the go.
Other useful things:
Sticky place mats for eating out (these are way classier, but personally I couldn’t justify the price difference for something that’s designed to be spilled on and thrown out)
Sippy cup/bottle tethers (If your cups have handles, you can just use toy tethers, but ones like these have a non-slip grip designed for bottles)
First aid kit (I already keep one in my diaper bag with some bandaids, and neosporin, for trips I add hyrdrocortisone, a thermometer, and infant Tylenol)
Alcohol wipes (good for cleaning off baby utensils on the go)
Gate check bag(s) (for stroller/car seat). This one worked ok for our stroller, but already has a small rip. At some point I may just take it apart to use as a pattern and make my own.
Mini bottle of dish soap
Travel bottle brush (we use the Como Tomo bottles which have a really wide neck so we didn’t need this, but depending on your bottle style it might be useful)
Fly Direct
Depending on where you’re located, this won’t always be an option. If you have the option to fly non-stop DO IT. There will be fewer pressure changes for baby, and less hassle of hauling all your crap around an airport.
Condense your Baggage
When it was just me and Matt flying, we’d travel with 2 carry-on suitcases + my purse. Easy-peasy. This time around we knew we were going to have to check luggage. We had 1 medium-sized suitcase we packed for everyone (rather than individual suitcases for each traveler). This not only cut down on baggage fees, but allowed us more free hands. Just keep in mind, airlines tend to charge an extra fee if your bag exceeds a certain weight so if you pack heavy, weigh your bag and check policies beforehand.
Be Prepared
In addition to our checked bag, I also packed an emergency carry-on suitcase. This was basically the everything-goes-wrong-and-holy-shit-now-it’s-the-zombie-apocalypse bag. I had a couple changes of clothes for Wesley (in addition to the back-up outfits in my diaper bag), one change of clothes for me and Matt (because babies tend to poop on you at the most inconvenient times), a 2 day supply of diapers, and extra formula.* Once we checked our bag we were left with one carry-on suitcase, a diaper bag, my purse, and a stroller. Strollers and car seats are typically exempt from baggage limits, but always check your airline’s policies.
You Don’t Need it All
If you’re going to visit family/friends, check with them ahead of time to see if they have (or can borrow) larger baby items–car seat, pack-n-play, highchair/booster. If you’re not, check with your rental car company to see if they also rent car seats, and check with your hotel to see if they provide cribs. Even if things cost a bit extra, it may be worth your sanity to not have to lug EVERYTHING around with you.
If you do need to Bring All the Things, you may want to invest in some travel-specific gear (which may not be worth it unless you’re a frequent traveler). The Cosco Scenera seems to be a popular choice for travel since it’s FAA rated (so you can use it on the plane), it’s lightweight (about 10lbs), and fairly easy to install. You can also get things that let you strap the car seat to your luggage, or convert it into a stroller. If you think you’ll need a highchair (like if you’re staying in an Air BNB, or with non-baby family/friends), I’m personally eying this one for our next trip. It’s inexpensive, condenses pretty darn flat, and still provides a boost to get baby at the right table height.
*Which promptly got my bag flagged by security because I was traveling with a large box of powder. They just had to run some magic swab over the box and we were good to go.
First of all, Happy Mothers Day to all the mother, grandmothers, step-mothers, and mothers-to-be out there. You are all AMAZING.
A lot has happened in the last month! Our little chunker has continued to grow and finally has teeth (2, with more on the way)! And is mobile! He’s not exactly “crawling,” but he is dragging himself across the floor with determination.* One of the daycare teachers compared him to a seal. We’re not quite sure if he will ever actually discover he has knees or not. He’s also (just in the last few days) figured out how to sit up on his own. He’ll be on his belly, push himself onto his hands, walk his back legs forward so his butt is way up in the air, then tip it to one side and push off with his hands so he’ll fall back and hopefully land on his bum. It’s quite the production but he does seem to be getting slighting more efficient at that at least.
A while back I did a round-up of my favorite IKEA staples. Now here’s another for the parents.
I love these bibs! Compact, wipeable, machine washable (air dry), and dirt cheap. Even our daycare uses these. We have some Bumpkins bibs too and while the crumb-catcher pocket is nice, these ones are a great travel backup since I don’t have to worry about losing them.
This is just an IKEA classic! The moose is pretty darn cute on it’s own, but this sheep hack for it? There are no other words than “totes adorbs.” If you’re feeling nerdy and creative I think you could totally hack it into a unicorn or dragon too.
I never had a giant wooden train set growing up, but I loved playing with the ones set up at stores. The LILLABO series makes the tracks much more affordable (although the trains themselves are a little boring). Although they advertise as being compatible with other big-name sets (Brio, Thomas, etc), my research tells me the tracks themselves don’t fit perfectly with other brands. The takeaway is save on the tracks, but splurge on the trains.
Rugs
IKEA is awesome for kids rugs because most of them are inexpensive enough that your kid can destroy them and no harm, no foul. The have a couple cool play-mat options too.
Look who’s 9 months! He’s also 22 1/2 pounds and getting awfully heavy to tote around.
Not much new to report on the baby front. Wesley’s still not crawling (although he’s mastered spinning in circles) and still no teeth (but drooling like crazy and getting a little cranky at times). He’s starting to show a little bit of motivation when it comes to crawling, especially if he sees the cats.
Keeping Clean
Babies are just perpetual mess makers, aren’t they? They spit up, they poop (sometimes explosively), they don’t know how to wipe their own noses, they mash food into every crevice imaginable… I could go on.
It can see overwhelming dealing with the never-ending flow of bodily excretions, but once you have a routine down it’s really not that bad.
And of course, the general disclaimer before we begin: I am not affiliated with any of the products mentioned. These are all things I’ve found through my own independent research.
Butts
Let’s just start at the bottom, shall we? Keeping baby’s tushy clean is necessary from day 1. We had a few assorted sample packs of Huggies and Pampers wipes, but we’ve defaulted to Amazon Elements pretty much from the beginning. They’re free of added fragrances, parabens, dyes, alcohol, phthalates, bronopol, and methylisothiazolinone, but at a much better price point than Water Wipes. We just buy the regular unscented and have never had an issue with skin sensitivity.
Honestly, 9 months out and we have yet to have an issue with diaper rash. Every so often we see a small redish splotch and we’ll just hit it with some diaper cream (we use Boudreaux’s Butt Paste, although I’m honestly not a huge fan of the very powdery scent). We also probably change Wesley’s diaper more frequently than we really need to, but hey, if it’s helped prevent uncomfortable diaper rash then I’ll stick with it. (If you’re curious about what kind of diapers we use, we started with Pampers Swaddlers for the first couple months, then switched to Target brand, and his daycare gets their diapers from Costco)
Feeding Frenzy
Once you introduce solids, the mess takes on a whole new level! We have this high chair, and while it’s been working out just fine, I would probably switch up my recommendation to a high chair that doesn’t have a cover/detached cushion but rather is fully wipe-able (like this one by Oxo). The cushion on ours is machine washable (but air dry, it does dry fast though), but I’m going to experiment in making something a little lower-maintenance.
Once you give your baby any finger foods they will also instantly realize that these foods can also be dropped on the floor. If you have wood/vinyl/tile floors, this isn’t a huge issue, but we have an area rug in our dining room and didn’t want to be constantly scrubbing ground-in carrot out of it. I picked up this splat-mat which was both well reviewed and one of the cheaper options. I happen to like that it’s just clear vinyl so it doesn’t compete with decor. So far we haven’t had issues with tripping or slipping with it either. The vinyl has a LOT of creases from it being folding during shipment, but I heard you can use a blow-drier to soften them out (it’s on my to-do list)
Laundry
Ah yes, laundry. The thing everyone warns you about once you add a baby to the mix. Honestly it hasn’t been that big a deal for us–really just an extra load of laundry every week. It does involve some extra stain treatment work though.
When we’re dealing with the aftermath of a blow-out, any casualty clothing items get rinsed out in our utility sink. When I’m ready to do laundry I’ll use a stain treatment spray (OxiClean Max Force has been working well for me so far). I also toss in a scoop of OxiClean laundry booster and use a fragrance/dye free detergent. I use these same products on my own laundry too (although I usually skip the laundry booster), mostly because I hate scented detergents (but who really want a different laundry product for every member of the family?).
For REALLY tough stains, I break out the big guns. You may have already caught on that I’m a bit of an OxiClean fan girl, but seriously, this stuff works really well. If you follow the instructions for a more concentrated soak you’ll be able to remove almost any stain. To whiten your whites (without compromising colors) the OxiClean White Revive is a frickin miracle worker. I use it on our bedding all the time since skin oils make whites get really dingy. It works equally well on spit-up, poop, and beets too.
Ufff… we’re finally starting to slow down on the weight front! At 7 months Wesley is still hovering under the 20lb mark at 19lbs and 10oz. He seems to have finally fought off the persistent Daycare Cold and also managed to pass Hand Foot and Mouth to me without actually getting it himself. Yay?
Wesley is still an amazingly chill little boy! He’s been doing great at daycare and is a very happy boy at home too. The cats have really started to catch his eye, and it is SO cute to watch his face light up when Schmutz walks up to him (Mort is a bit more cautious and I can’t say I blame him… especially after Wesley started chewing on his tail when it got within reach). Wesley is also a lazy little boy so he doesn’t seem to have a lot of motivation to crawl yet, but I’m sure it will happen eventually. Usually when we put him on his tummy he just sprawls dramatically and makes pathetic noises.
Wesley actually has 2 different jumpers. The one they have at daycare is one of the ginormous, super-springy ones and he adores it! We got this one (which has a smaller footprint) for at home. He really likes all the toys on it and has just figured out how to get some spring out of it. He definitely bounces much more at daycare though.
This Batman teether constantly saves the day! Almost anytime he gets fussy, handing him this will stop the crying. Batman fixes everything.
I have never gotten so many belly laughs out this boy than when we’re playing with this caterpillar. He loves the big cartoon-y eyes and all the different textures. The velcro is pretty darn strong right out of the box, so he’s not strong enough to pull it apart yet, but he’ll get there.
Matt really wanted to get him So Many Stars, illustrated by Andy Warhol and it looks like we’re on our way to raising a little art snob. The text may leave a little something to be desired, but this may be Wesley’s favorite book illustration-wise.
Introducing him to foods has been going slowly. He seems to really like fruits, but isn’t so sure about veggies yet (oh, and if you’re wondering how the Baby Led Weaning is going, he actually does WAY better with purees…we still offer him “mashable” foods periodically though). His absolute favorite food seems to be this Happy Baby yogurt. Now, I’m not even remotely a “crunchy” mom. “Organic” carries very little weight me and I don’t actually believe GMOs are going to destroy us all.* What I do love about this brand though is that there is no added sugar (or sugar substitute!) in the yogurt. Where’s my adult-sized no-added-sugar yogurt???? Bonus: Wesley likes the banana-sweet potato flavor (although the peach-mango seems to be his fav) so we’re able to sneak in some veggies. Boo-ya!
This roly-poly boy turned 5 months on Sunday. Can you believe it? I feel like I’m running behind on everything right now. I blame Christmas since we’re celebrating with family a week early so I’ve been behind since day one.
At 5 months old Wesley is weighing at 18lbs but is a mere (ie perfectly average) 25.5 inches long. He still loves his food (obviously) but we haven’t started him on solids yet. Our pediatrician advised that starting too early will just end in tears all around and Wesley hasn’t shown a lot of interest in us eating yet so we’re just going to wait until closer to 6 months.*
Our big milestone this month was Wesley’s first unplanned doctor’s visit. It wasn’t anything terribly serious, but he had been screaming nearly non-stop since about 4am and we knew he had been dealing with daycare colds. As soon as we packed him up to go to the doctor’s office, he stopped crying. And once we were there he was all smiles. What. The. Hell. child? We seem to have avoided the 4 Month Sleep Regression I kept hearing about, but he did have an odd night or too when he just wasn’t feeling well and was extra fussy.
Wesley’s favorite things at the moment include anything with faces, his jumper at daycare, anything he can fit in his mouth, and falling over on our bed (seriously, you hold him up, let him plop onto the mattress and he giggles like it’s the best thing in the world). According to Matt his favorite song is Fat Bottomed Girls. This kid is nothing but classy.
I was planning on doing a new Baby Loves post, but his favorite toys are all still pretty much the same. Here are some (untested) items we’re eyeing for him though. Matt and I aren’t really planning on getting him anything for Christmas since he’s too young to have any idea what’s going on (and not coordinated enough for the joy of ripping off paper). Our Christmas present to him is a 529 Plan contribution. Adulting is just so exciting.
We did pass on some suggestions to our families though since many people (myself included) love shopping for kiddos. We definitely tried to lean a little more towards the practical side (see Adulting comment above).
Books
I’m a firm believer that you can NEVER have too many books. Press Here may be a little old for Wesley at the moment, but it an awesome book! It’s interactive without being a pop-up or lift-the-flap style. Where’s My Cow was a must given my love of Terry Pratchett (and Welsey has liked when I’ve read to him from the adult books). Matt’s contribution was So Many Stars, because Andy Warhol.
Feeding
We’re getting close to starting Wesley on solids, so some food-related ideas seemed practical. He’s been showing an interest in holding his own bottles and these handles are designed to fit our Como Tomo bottles. We have some rubber-tipped spoons, but chunkier utensils have been recommended if mixing baby-led-weaning with some purees.** These bamboo bowls were also super cute! And not garishly colored, which can be hard to find for baby gear.
Toys
We’re trying not to go crazy with toys (wishful thinking?) but since Wesley’s showing more interest in interacting with things, it seems like a good idea to add in a few. Franky the Hanky Whale seems like a brilliant idea since I’ve heard kids often enjoy ripping kleenex out of the box. I feel like the bead-maze style toys are pretty classic, and B. makes some really fabulous looking toys (although I haven’t had a chance to try them out yet). Welsey also enjoys splashing in his tub*** (and nomming on his soapy washcloth) so I think we’re getting close to giving him some bath toys.
Clothes
We got gobs of hand-me-down clothes up to around 12month sizing. Baby clothes have the benefit of being (usually) practical as well as ridiculously fun to shop for.
*It doesn’t really matter exactly when you introduce solids since the first year babies still get pretty much all their nutrition from breast milk/formula.
**Our pediatrician recommended baby-led-weaning, but most articles I’ve read on it still mix in some purees.
***He actually scrunches up his face and wails for the first 10 seconds when you put him in the tub and then he’s fine–even giggles and splashes.
Daaaaamn has it been 4 months already? Welsey’s still packin’ on the pounds weighing in at 17lbs 3oz and measuring about 24.5″ long. My little chunky monkey is mostly fitting into 9 month clothing. Seriously kid, stop growing–you’re heavy!
We started him in daycare this past week (my mom stayed with us in October to transition going back to work) and according to the teachers there he’s been a great little guy. He did pick up his first cold and, like a good little sharer, immediately passed it on to me. He’s overall in a good mood, but definitely a little extra clingy and sleepy… and he really hates our snot-sucker but it totally gets the job done!
Around 3 months Wesley actually started showing interest in things. We’re getting tons of smiles now and he’s responding back when we make burbly noises at him. We are even getting baby giggles out of this guy. Seriously, this is just making my heart melt! He’s actively watching the goings-on in the house, purposefully kicking at his gym, and starting to grab and wave toys around. It’s like he’s an actual tiny human instead of a little lump! He’s also started to be able to lift his shoulders off the ground in practice for sitting up. This kid is so frickin’ strong it’s mind-blowing! He just needs to work on his coordination so he can put that strength to good use.
Wesley is still stupidly difficult to burp. I swear he’s actively working against us to try not to burp and then he’ll get fussy over an hour after eating and (eventually) let out a belch that would put a grown man to shame. Still, there are worse difficulties to have with a baby and for the most part Wesley is an awesomely easy and chill little dude. He seems to be in the beginning stages of teething right now and I’ve heard 4 Month Sleep Regression is a thing so we’ll see how this month goes….
Now that this guy has a little interest in the world around him, we definitely starting to see what bits of baby gear of proving to be a hit with him.
His paci-plushies are fantastic! He can grab them with his little pudgy hands and keep the pacifier in his mouth better. He’ll also suck/chew on the plushy part too. We’ve got both the fox and dragon shakies (they rattle a bit) and both are hit.
This Winkel ball is amazing! The loops are pretty small so tiny hands can fit around them easily, and the way it’s structured means it’s still grab-able without a lot of hand coordination (baby can worm his fingers between the loops even if his hand isn’t closing around it). It’s also brightly colored and rattles so it definitely grabs his interest.
The Skip Hop baby gym has been a huge hit with him as well. He’s been actively kicking at the hanging toys for a while and has recently started reaching for them with his hands too.
This wood and silicone teether has just recently been worthy of interest. Welsey seems like he’s just starting the beginning stages of teething (drooling and chewing, but thankfully no pain yet) so he enjoys having small things to chomp on and the 2 different textures seem to be interesting for him.
Sophie la Girafe may be the most pretentious baby toy out there, but I’ve never heard of kid not liking it and Wesley’s no exception. She has a face he can look at. She squeaks. She’s easily grab-able and delightfully chewable.
I bought some wool dryer balls shortly before Wesley was born. I had been meaning to switch to them for awhile (dryer sheets are pretty chemical-y and tend to coat towels, making them less absorbent) and having a baby served as a good kick in the right direction. They seem to work pretty well for most clothes and towels, but I have noticed that larger things, like fleece blankets, still stay pretty static-y when you first pull them out of the dryer.
Oh my goodness, my little peanut is 3 months old! At 15lbs 6oz he’s also not so little anymore. Some moms get weepy as their babies get bigger and bigger but I’m really excited that he’s more alert and able to interact more. The most exciting thing of all is that Wesley is usually sleeping around 5 hours at night!!!
Our little chunker currently enjoys having his noises repeated, listening to Matt play guitar, watching TV and video games (yeah, yeah, we’re horrible parents), kicking wildly at his baby gym, and fake standing (we support him while he pushes against the ground with his legs). We’re getting cuter baby coos out of him as well as more and more smiles (although he mostly resorts to RBF–Resting Baby Face). Wesley has also learned how to roll front to back (although he doesn’t do it with any regularity yet) and is getting a little grabbier with both toys and my hair.
He still does not like being hungry and hates having to burp. He also does not like his crib much which we’ll be trying to deal with before he starts daycare in a month. I’m officially done with my maternity leave, but my mom’s staying with us until November to ease the transition from starting work to starting Wesley in daycare.
Wesley has yet to show any interest in the cats, but Mort’s been acting like an older sibling with a new baby. He’s figured out places where we pay extra attention to Wesley and will hang out there (look at me! I’m a baby too!). He’ll play with the baby gym, lay on both our changing pads, play with Wesley’s toys, and, after watching us try and get Wesley used to his crib, has started jumping in there (although only when it’s unoccupied). Just last night I had to pull him out of the rock-n-play so I could get Wesley to bed. Schmutz on the other hand, fully recognizes when I have my hands full of baby and chooses those moments to misbehave and just stare me down if I scold her.
Whatcha Need
Hold on to your hats, this is a long one….
At 3 months in, we’ve had some time to evaluate our stash of baby gear so I have some suggestions for people looking to put together their baby registries. Keep in mind that different life styles will mean different types of gear–there’s no one magic list for everyone. Our biggest criteria was multi-functional pieces. I (of course) also wanted things that looked good–why do so many baby things have to look like a clown exploded on them?
Before I get started on the long list, I do want to point out that there’s very little you really need for a baby, but there are a bunch of things that will make your life much easier If you’re looking for extreme minimalism you really just need a safe place for the baby to sleep, a safe way to transport the baby, a way to feed the baby, and things to dress the baby in. I will be the first to admit that I am not a minimalist, but I also did not want to be completely overrun with baby gear (plus they grow out of stuff SO fast).
I’ve included links to the products for examples only. I am not affiliated with the companies selling the products.
Gear
Travel System (or infant car seat + stroller)
Crib
Rocker/Glider (or comfy chair of your choice)
Bouncer/Swing/Rocker
Baby Carrier
High Chair (not essential immediately)
We opted for a travel system (car seat + base + stroller that all click together) and chose the Graco Comfy Cruiser. It’s at a great price point, fairly compact, and the stroller has a nice sized basket. I really like the Chicco Bravo Trio too, especially since you could break down the stroller so it would just be a car seat carrier. For us that one bonus feature didn’t justify the price difference though. Now, you could just get a convertible car seat that will last much longer, but being able to pop a sleeping infant from car to stroller without unstrapping them is REALLY nice.
My mom questioned if we really wanted a 30″ car seat vs a 35″ but here’s my logic: 1) Matt and I both have small cars 2) Neither of us is especially tall so we weren’t anticipating a super long baby 3) By the time Wesley outgrows the 30″ car seat he’ll probably be too heavy for us to really use the car seat as a carrier too so we’ll just switch to a convertible car seat and pop him in and out of the stroller.
What to consider in a travel system:
30 vs 35″ car seat (is your family especially tall in general? Will it fit in your car(s)?)
How easy is it to adjust the car seat harness? (you’ll be doing a lot of adjusting–this is the one area the Comfy Cruiser fell a bit short for us, but it’s not that much of hassle)
Stroller/wheel style (are you jogger? do you like off-roading it? purely city use?)
Ease of folding/compact-ness (where will you be storing it when not in use, will it fit in your car(s)?)
Weight
Height (comfy for both parents?)
Stroller storage space
Parent tray/cup holders
Baby tray (do you want it to be fully removable?)
Matt and I both had different opinions when it came to baby carriers so we ended up getting 2–a Baby Bjorn Carrier One and a Baby K’tan. Men and women tend to naturally carry weight differently so this isn’t too surprising. The Bjorn was a little pricey, but we really liked that this model could go from infant to small toddler without any extra pieces needed. I liked the K’tan because it seemed less complicated than a Moby or Boba wrap and more versatile than a sling. It’s also much more compact than the Bjorn so I can fit it in my diaper bag.
Some of the best baby shopping advice I got was from my sister-in-law–don’t buy all the fancy gear. Pick a swing OR bouncer OR rocker… or skip it all until you know what sort of motion your kid likes. We got a Rock-n-Play which is seriously the only baby item that the internet agrees on. It’s worked out great for us so far! I also ended up borrowing a swing from a friend for him to try out, but his rocker is still his favorite.
Not (exactly) on the checklist is some sort of bassinet type thing. It’s highly recommended that babies share your room for a stupid long time, so you may need a sleeping space that fits in your room. I don’t think it’s worth buying a fancy bassinet, but you could see if you can borrow one from a friend or find one cheap/free on Craig’s List. You could also use a pack-n-play (some even come with an infant bassinet attachment), a rock-n-play, or a box. Yes, a box. The Twin Cities did a free baby box program this year so we have our very own European-style baby box. Wesley ended up preferring the rock-n-play though.
Although a high chair won’t be necessary for a bit, we still registered for one, but also chose one that could be reclined quite a bit for smaller babies (Safety First Dine and Recline). This way we could have a nearby, eye-level spot for Wesley at dinner if he’s awake and interested in the goings on. This particular high chair also works as a booster for kids who are ready to sit at the table properly so we should get some good use out of it. The one downside is that this particular high chair does not fold down. We have enough space in our dining room that this isn’t a problem for us, but it may be a deal-breaker for some people. There are also booster seats (with trays) that attach to regular chairs, and seats that hook onto the table itself.
Optional Items
Pack-n-Play–if you travel or want a baby “docking station” on a second floor, different room, or plan to travel
Play Mat/Baby Gym–you can also just use a blanket/carpet and some toys (We picked out this baby gym because it was bright and cheery, but didn’t look like a clown exploded on it. I also really liked this Jonathan Adler one #designSnobMom).
Second car seat base–if you frequently use multiple cars
Arguably Useless
Changing table–you can turn pretty much any surface into a changing table, heck downstairs we just change diapers on the floor! If you’re buying furniture think about multi-functional pieces–you can put a changing pad on a dresser or deep, short shelves and save yourself some space.
Sleeping
Swaddles/Sleepsacks (2-3)
Crib sheets (3)
Mattress Protectors (2)
Receiving blankets (4)
Muslin blankets (4)
I registered for a few different types of swaddle/sleepsacks since I didn’t know what would work for us and Wesley. Don’t go too crazy with the advance stock-piling though because some babies hate being swaddled. Personally I’d suggest starting off with 2-3 different ones in newborn/small sizes. So far my favorite has been the Halo sleepsacks–they have a lightweight muslin option that has been great for summer and they’re pretty flexible so you can do a full burrito, hands out, or arms out swaddle depending on what your baby likes. Now that he’s bigger and it’s colder we have one fleece sleepsack and one 100% cotton one (plus and extra cotton one o keep at daycare) I’ve also heard people highly recommend the Miracle Blanket and Woombie.
You probably will want to somewhat stock up on blankets since you can use them for everything! Keeping baby warm, spill guard, sun shade, nursing cover…the possibilities are endless! I’d start out with at least 3-4 muslin blankets and 3-4 flannel receiving blankets (both seem to frequently come in packages of 4). I’d probably only register for 4 of each because people may (very likely) gift you even more.
Optional Items
White Noise Machine–baby might not care or be fine with just a fan
Nightlight–useful for late night changings/feedings
Feeding
Bottles
Bibs
Bottle brush
Burp cloths (10+)
Milk storage (if pumping)
Baby spoons
Small bowls
Bottles are another thing you may not want to stock pile right away because babies can be picky. I’d suggest 2-4 different types of bottles (and only 1-2 of each type depending on how they’re packaged). Think of it as creating a sampler pack until you know what your baby actually likes (this is another good time to try and borrow from friends to do a test run before stockpiling your own.) . We’ve had good luck with the Comotomo bottles (which is good because I totally did not follow my own advice here). We’re combo feeding breast milk and formula and we really only use 2-3 bottles at home with another bottle stashed in each diaper bag. We hand wash them between uses and I’ll toss them into the dishwasher if we’re already set to run it. If you’re only breast feeding or only bottle feeding (or your daycare wants you to provide a certain amount) you may need more or less. FYI: If you’ll be putting your baby in childcare, many places won’t take glass bottles.
If you’re breastfeeding and pumping you may want to think about milk storage options too. I really liked the Tomee Tippee storage bags because they can connect to most pumps with some inexpensive adapters, and are nice and compact for storage. Tomee Tippee also has a bottle line that’s compatible with them if you don’t want to be pouring them into a separate bottle… but personally I’d stick that in the “Arguably Useless” category.
A word on burp cloths: you can probably never have too many! I keep one stashed everywhere we might be feeding so we never have to go hunting. They make some cute patterned ones, but I like the basic, cloth diaper option. If you’re crafty you can cute them up on your own too. I didn’t bother because “spit-up” is really just a euphemism for baby puke.
If you’re looking towards the future you may also want to consider some baby spoons and small bowls. Most babies start solids between 4-6 months and the time will go fast! How many you need will depend on how willing you are to hand wash or how often you run your dishwasher.
Optional Items
Nursing pillow–you can use a regular pillow for extra support, or just hold the baby (I do love my Boppy though)
Nursing cover–you may not care/only use bottles when you’re out or you can use a muslin blanket
Baby food storage–if you’re making your own baby food you can just freeze it in an ice cube tray and defrost as needed (I’ll still probably be picking up some of these Oxo Blocks for on-the-go usage though)
Bottle drying rack–we just use our regular drying rack
Bottle warmer–we used an electric kettle and glass measuring cup to make a water bath (never use the microwave). If you want a bottle warmer, just make sure it fits your chosen bottles.
Sectioned formula dispenser–if you’re using formula, you can portion out a few bottles worth for your diaper bag so you don’t have to measure on the go.
Arguably Useless
Formula mixer–powdered formula dissolves SO easily, just dump it in the bottle with water and shake.
Baby food maker–if you want to make your own baby food there’s no need to pay a premium for a baby-specific food processor. If you already have a food processor or blender you’re good to go, other just pick up any mini food processor.*
Fancy sterilizer–unless your baby has some crazy immune system issues, a good soap-and-water scrubbing should clean everything just fine. You can also periodically toss things in a pot of boiling water (double check that the material can take it, but most baby things can)
Bathing
Baby bathtub
Hooded towels (2)
Washcloths
Baby shampoo + wash
A baby bathtub is probably the only thing that’s isn’t really straight forward in this category. I wanted a tub that would fit in my sink/on the counter so baby would be at a comfy (for me!) height during bath time. I liked how compact the Puj tub (or the Puj Flyte)was, but it seemed too big for our bathroom sink and too small for our kitchen sink. The Angelcare bath support jumped out at me too, but it was also the wrong size for our sinks. We ended up going with the Boon Soak bath tub. I thought it would fit in our kitchen sink, but I was wrong because our sink is set up oddly. Luckily, because it’s a tub and not just a support it works just fine on our counter too.
Optional Items
You may want to wait to pick these up until you find you need them.
Soft brush–if your baby has a lot of hair
Cradle cap brush/comb–if your baby develops cradle cap (flaky dead skin gunk on the scalp). Wesley had a very minor case of it and we cleaned it up just with olive oil and gentle massaging with a washcloth, but some babies get it way worse. Google it if you want to be kind of grossed out (don’t worry, it’s not dangerous at all, just icky-looking).
Diapering
Diaper Pail
Changing pad
Changing pad covers (2-3)
Diaper bag
Obviously you’ll need diapers/wipes/diaper cream too. Don’t get too many newborn sized diapers though–your kid will either outgrow them quickly or be born a monster (8+ lbs) and never fit them. For reference, Wesley was 7lbs 12oz when he was born and we switched to size 1 diapers around 3 weeks.
Because we have a 2 story house, we have changing stations on both floors. Wesley’s nursery has a full changing pad + cover, and downstairs we have a basket stocked with diapers/wipes/cream and a simple folding changing mat. Quite frankly you can change your baby on pretty much anything, but it’s useful to have something easily washable/wipe-able underneath in case they decide join in the moment.
A diaper pail isn’t exactly necessary, but something to contain dirty diapers is definitely very useful. I’m a fan of the Ubbi pail, largely because it doesn’t require specific bags. It’s also mostly steel so less likely to absorb odors than a plastic pail. Price-wise it’s not much different than a steel trash can, but seals better.
Diaper bags will be another pretty personal choice. Are you a travel minimalist? Do you like being prepared for every possible situation? I went with the Skip Hop Duo bag because it seemed like a nice mid-size option and was very well reviewed. One of my friends swears by the Ju Ju Be bags. I got Matt a Diaper Dude Sport (unfortunately I think this style is discontinued and there are limited color options available currently) bag for Father’s Day because every bag I liked he thought was too purse-like. I like our 2 diaper bag system because I always know that mine is properly stocked, it’s hardly necessary to have separate bags though.
Wipe warmer–I know some people who love their wipe warmers, but Wesley’s never complained.
Wipe container–Even though it is arguably useless, I still really like my Oxo weighted wipe dispenser. It just makes all the diapering supplies in the nursery look a little more stream-lined. If you order Amazon brand wipes they also come with a simple dispenser.
Covers for your changing pad covers–this is why you have the first cover, just pull it off and wash it. It’s fine.
Clothing
Onsies (6-10/size)
Sleepers (3-5/size)
Leggings/pants (2-5/size)
Hats
Socks
I don’t have great advice for how many clothes you should have since it will depend on how messy your kid is and how often you tend to do laundry. Onsies and zip-up sleepers will probably make up the bulk of your baby wardrobe since they’re easy and comfy for sleepy babies. We lucked out and got a TON of hand-me-down clothes. If you’re starting from scratch, my best guess would be to start off with 6-10 onsies and 3-5 sleepers in each size, and maybe 2-5 leggings/soft pants for cooler months. If you’re gifted a ton of brand new clothes, don’t remove tags and wash everything all at once in case you need to exchange things for different sizes.
The zip-up style sleepers are especially nice because they’re really easy to deal with for diaper changes. Some people also really like the baby gowns because there are no snaps/zips, just elastic at the bottom. Neither Matt nor I was a fan though–the elastic was kind of a pain to pull up over wiggly baby legs for diaper changes and it just looked like Wesley was wearing a potato sack.
Baby socks are notoriously bad at staying on, but I will say that the Trumpette brand work pretty well (I just wish they sold some more neutral colored sets too). The only downside is that Matt has started calling them “Little Trump socks.” I’m pretty sure he only continues to do it because I glare at him every time. We’ve had some other socks stay on really well too, but since they were hand-me-downs I don’t have a brand to share.
We considered using Nest for a video monitor, but haven’t actually bothered getting any sort of monitor yet. If you do opt for a video monitor, just be warned you may catch a glimpse of a demon baby in the middle of the night. Once we move Wesley into his own room at night we may get a simple audio monitor, but honestly if you keep your baby close-ish (we keep him parked on the same floor, but don’t move him from room to room if he’s napping) to you during the day and their nursery is close to your bedroom (and you’re not a super heavy sleeper) you may not need a baby monitor at all.
I wanted the fancy infrared thermometer but both the baby care class we attended and our pediatrician both strongly recommended taking a baby’s temperature rectally for the most accurate reading. Sorry kid. There are some fancy nail clippers out there too, but we stuck with the basic again. I did however opt for the fancy Frida Baby Snot Sucker nasal aspirator. I haven’t had a chance to use it yet, but cold and flu season is now upon us…
Other Stuff
Pacifiers
Pacifer holders/toy clips
A few toys
Teethers
Mobile
Babies can be picky about pacifiers too since there are a couple different styles. You may also opt to just not use pacifiers. I originally got a Wubbanub since everyone seemed to love them, and they honestly work pretty well. The only down side is that the pacifier they come with is permanently attached and Wesley ended up preferring a different style (thanks for being difficult kid, that zebra was frickin’ adorable!).
I ordered a Nookum Paci-Plushie later on and it will work with the “button” style pacifiers (MAM brand) that he likes. The Dr Brown’s Lovies are even more flexible (you can pick up an attachment to work with the button styles), but they don’t have as cute of options (yes, my priorities may be a bit skewed). We also have a few “universal” toy/paci holders that clip on to his shirt, but the lovies are nice because he can hold them in place and if he spits out the paci it doesn’t fall far so sometimes he can even find it again on his own.
We didn’t go nuts with toys/teethers since it’s a while before a baby will really care. We picked out a couple brightly colored rattle-y toys, something to hang from his carseat, Sophie la Girafe, and I simply couldn’t resist this Batman teether (he also has a Batman onsies, hat, and shoes… and may even fit into all of them at the same time). Just remember when picking out toys that babies’ eyesight is really bad for while so focus on bright and high-contrast toys.
Ooof…. are you still with me? I know that was a long one. If you have any questions I’ll be happy to field them and if you have any favorite items feel free to chime in in the comments!
*I used to work in a kitchen at a nursing home; I am a goddamed pro at pureeing food. A cutesy face on a blender will not make it work any differently.
Look who’s 2 months! He actually turned 2 months a week ago, but I wanted to get the stats from his doctor visit.
This little chunker is now 13lbs 2oz and 23″ tall. He jumped up from the 40% to the 70% for weight in the last month so he may not be a monster baby yet, but he’s working on it!
We’re just starting to get “real” smiles out of Wesley which I gotta admit is pretty damn cool. He’s more and more alert, making eye contact, and usually sleeping about 5 hours at night. Basically he’s a pretty darn good baby–he even survived his 2 month vaccinations like a champ!
And now for your monthly rant:
I’m not a crazed feminist by any means. Quite frankly I believe there are differences between the sexes, but “different” doesn’t mean “superior.” For either gender. I recognize there are common preferences that may be used for targeted marketing (ex. a lot of little girls do like pink), but I am sick to death of overly stereotypical advertising. This means that nothing brings out my feminist side quite like looking at baby gear.
Men Are Not Idiots
At least, they’re no more likely to be idiots than women. A lot of baby commercials portray men as completely incompetent. I even have seen onsies with the head/arm/leg holes labeled and “Dad, you’ve got this” printed in the center. This sort of thing makes me feel downright twitchy. It’s not cool to assume women can’t use power tools, or code, or be athletic, and it just as not cool to assume that men handle babies (or cook, or sew, etc). In fact, dads can be pretty badass.
There’s More to Life Than Gray
Whenever I would look at baby clothes and sort them by “gender neutral” everything would be gray. Gray with sheep. Seriously? There are lots of gender neutral color and pattern options, how did it get limited to gray? And apparently sheep are the only “neutral” animal? If you’re trying to find gender neutral options, your best bet it to search under “boy” because that usually seems to mean “not pink or floral”
Which brings me to….
Gender is Not a Color
I was searching Amazon for pacifiers the other day and rather than list the colors as “blue/green” and “pink/purple” they would be listed as “boy colors” and “girl colors.” There was even a set that had a fox on a blue background and a raccoon on a tan background that was labeled as “boy colors.” Is it that hard to label things by color or pattern and leave gender out of it? Maybe your little girl likes cars. Maybe your little boy likes pink. These things don’t have to be gender specific. I have to give a shoutout to Primary because a while back I saw an advertisement of theirs that said pink wasn’t just for girls and showed a bunch of adorable little boys rockin’ some pink.
That all being said, I don’t think children need all gender neutral clothes and gear. We definitely dress Wesley in a slightly more “boyish” style and if we had had a girl I would have fully embraced pink and ruffles. I still wanted a gender neutral base wardrobe and accessories/gear though so if we have a second kid we’ll have plenty of things to reuse.
Our little peanut is 1 month old! Wesley is now 9lbs 12oz and 21″ long. He’s keeping his eyes open longer and starting to focus on faces. He’s discovered his fingers and I’ve already caught him sucking his thumb. Unfortunately, he’s also learned how to wail, but luckily he tends to calm down as soon as he’s cuddled.
Most people include likes and dislikes with monthly updates, but at this point he likes food, napping on mommy or daddy, and farting. He dislikes having to wait for food and being poopy. There’s not much excitement in being 1 month old…
If you’ve been reading at all about having a baby, you’ve probably also read that breastfeeding is Hard. I’m here to tell you it’s not hard, it’s stupidly frustrating and seemingly impossible at times! If anyone tells you that their baby had a perfect latch from day one and was always full and happy, you have my permission to punch her in the boob.*
Breastfeeding has been hands-down the hardest and most stressful part of having an infant around. It didn’t help matters that Wesley was an early baby either. Even though he was technically fully developed, it’s apparently pretty common for early babies to respond more like premies when it comes to feeding. Pretty much he would go to latch and immediately fall asleep without actually eating anything. It’s even more frustrating in the first few days before your milk comes in and we ended up having to supplement with donor breast milk while we were in the hospital.
Even once we got back home and my milk came in, it never seemed like there was enough to keep Wesley satisfied. It’s been a rough journey, but if you’re struggling too know that you are not alone! Talk to your mom friends, find a lactation consultant, and/or find a breastfeeding support group. Here are some things that helped me, but be sure to check with your pediatrician or lactation consultant since I am obviously not a doctor.**
Drink Drink Drink
Water that is. Hydrating the heck out of yourself is one of the best ways to ramp up milk production. Having a partner who will constantly refill your water cup throughout the day is incredibly helpful since it’s easy to get distracted and forget on your own (guilty).
Pump Pump Pump!
Breast milk production is a supply and demand situation so you can try and trick your body into making more. I tend to pump after Wesley nurses because he can’t seem to get everything on his own. Matt and I also split the night shift so I make sure to pump right before I go to bed so Matt has a bottle ready for the next feeding (letting me sleep through one!). You may also have a little one that just cannot seem to latch and it may be easier to pump and bottle feed. You do you mama!
Herbal Supplements
The lactation consultant in the hospital recommended Go-Lacta (Malungay). My endless internet quest for boosting milk supply mostly turned up recommendations for Fenugreek and Blessed Thistle. Our pediatrician recommended all of the above. Lots of people also recommended Mother’s Milk tea, but the flavors (anise) aren’t my thing so I prefer taking capsule supplements.
Cookies!
Yes, cookies! Or whatever baked goods you desire. There are tons of recipes out there for lactation cookies/breads/smoothies. What they all have in common in Brewers Yeast and Flax Meal so if you’re baking savvy you can probably modify an existing favorite recipe. Other food recommendations for boosting milk production include oatmeal, red Gatorade (?), and Starbucks “Pink Drink” (???).
This is the recipe I used for oatmeal cookies. You can totally switch around the “mix ins” for your own personal taste too. Not a fan of coconut? Skip it. Feel like nuts? Add ’em! You could also swap out the chocolate chips for a dried fruit (raisins/craisins/blue berries).
Don’t be afraid to supplement
Even doing all of the above we still have to supplement with formula. We decided the most important thing was to make sure our little guy was getting enough food. Anytime we supplement with formula I also make sure to pump and we give him any pumped milk the same day since there is a risk with supplementing that your milk supply will go down.
Our pediatrician (who is also a lactation consultant) is 100% on board with what we’re doing. Every bit of breast milk your baby gets is great and moms need to take care of themselves too (rather than wear themselves down stressing about about milk production). If you see magic promises of freezers full of breast milk on Pinterest, take them with a grain of salt. These things can help, but they may not be a magic instant fix.
Just remember, the most important thing is feeding your baby, so even if breastfeeding doesn’t work out for you at all, it’s ok, you are not a failure! As long as your baby is getting the necessary calories and checking out fine with the pediatrician, you’re doing great!
*Ok, not really, moms need to support other moms. If you’re one of the stupidly luckily mamas who had zero issues with breastfeeding, yay for you! Just be aware that your fellow mamas may be struggling and may also be close to (or well past) tears.
**Matt really likes to tell people “Trust me, I’m a doctor.” And while he does indeed have a doctorate, no one in their right mind trusts lawyers 🙂
